Posts Tagged ‘BFFs’

Socializing While In Pain

September 3, 2021

Do I socialize when I’m in pain?

Yup, I socialize, otherwise I’d be a hermit!

Yup! Otherwise I’d be a hermit. Plus, very few friends can identify how much I’m in pain. My bff & my sister can tell by looking at me.. I have other friends & family who have learned the signs.

Mom can tell usually just by looking at me.. not always, but usually.. My sister is pretty good.. Her kids & hubby not so much – ironically I think the kid of hers that would recognize the best is her youngest, because he has seen me the most over the last few years.

My guy friend T has, over the last 3½ years learned quite a bit about how to read the non-verbal clues.

My BFF also has fibro & is sometimes a little too focused on her own fibro to catch my issues. Only reason I can gauge her easily is that she has an emotional response to her issues that I don’t even think she’s aware of.

My second BFF also has his own issues, and usually only sees me on better days.. I don’t think he’s even seen me at mediocre or worse in a long time..

Them there’s some of the Scouters I work with.. Raksha 13th & I have become good friends through Scouting & Rainbow I’ve known since grade 8 or 9, but through guiding & scouting as well. They are pretty good a picking things up.

There are other friends who are less prevalent in my life but even they can recognize some signs if I’m having issues

What I Can Do.

So, there is the basics of who I tend to see most, then the next thing is *what I can do*. Mind you the days when I’m seriously f****d up due to symptoms, I don’t talk to anyone unless I haveta Haveta HAVETA.

Now pain & other symptoms varyy from week to week, day to day, even hour to hour.. Fortunately in the last few years the hour to hour option seems to happen less and less frequently, but for a long time that is how I had to play it.

When my pain levels are super high, any communication is digital.. To everyone. If you’re lucky..

Digital Communication Only on my Worst Days, At Best

Next level down:

  • Mild exercise like walking my dog around the court
  • Have company over for low maintenance visits
  • Socialize for dinner with Mom & Dad
Exercise by walking the Dog Around the Court Is All I Can Handle Some Days.

As my pain levels drop, I can be more sociable in activities that require less interaction such as:

  • Hanging out with selects friends in a quiet environment, such as a campfire, living room, patio, poolside, dock.. This would be BFF’s, & T, for the most part
  • Walking around the neighbourhood
  • Watching the kids’ soccer games
  • Visiting the family cottage for a few days
  • Visiting the gym for a hot tub!
Hanging out with Friends, in Front of the Campfire, or Otherwise, Though we use Chairs – LOL

As the pain levels drop a moderate to low level I can usually do the following:

  • Karaoke
  • General.Cub Scout Activities
  • Marksmanship
  • Hangout with friends in a noisier, bigger, busier location like a restaurant or bar
  • Moderate exercise like the walks with my sister & the pups
  • cub Scout meetings!
  • Glamping at my BFF’s cottage
  • Concerts (depending on who, I may go on a worse day & accept the consequences)
  • Professional sporting events like the Leafs, TFC or The Rock.. & to a lesser extent, Argos, Jays or Raptors..
Concerts with Friends Are Always Fun!!

So assuming my pain level is low, there is a lot I can do. I can:

  • More strenuous exercise such as cycling
  • Visit the gym for Aquafit, yoga, weights, or the track. I had gotten in a few slow Zumba classes in before COVID..
  • I can Camp – not the glamping like at the cottage, but camping with friends, and even my Cub Scouts . In fact we were going to Camp Impressa for a year end camp earlier this month with my senior Cubs & the Scouts (See more in this post).. & I just went camping 2 weekends ago with T
  • Sporting activities like soccer with the girls or golfing with T
  • Some of the more physical activities in Cub Scouts.. Such as teaching how to put up tents, waterproofing the bedroll, setting up grey water, basic orienteering, limited kayaking/canoeing, etc..
  • The Pheonix. – Dancing at the club!
  • Hiking (like fairly flat, fairly short, nothing overnight – Second Marsh near me is a good example)
  • Roadtrip!
Easy Hiking with Friends

What I can not do.

There are so many things now that I would like to do that I just not in the cards. These are activities the I’ve either done or were at one point on the bucket list. This includes activities such as:

  • White water rafting. T wants to go – I can do the camping part, but not the rafting part
  • Backpacking/ Hiking. This includes longer hikes, more challenging hikes, or overnight hikes. I can not lug an air mattress through the wilderness 😄
  • Winter outdoor camping
  • Amusements parks – can’t do most of the rides, and way too much walking.
  • Skiing
  • Horseback Riding
  • Zip-lining (not sure I’d do that anyways)
Canada’s Wonderland, the Prominent Amusement Park in the Toronto Ontario Area.

What would you like to do that you know you will never do again?

Post-Christmas Crash 2020

January 1, 2021

Every year the inevitable happens. I manage decently enough getting ready for Christmas, pacing myself trying not to overdo it. Every year I end up failing miserably before the holidays end.

Some years I’ve managed to get through Christmas Day with a nap and crash afterwards. . Some years I’ve actually had to postpone Christmas from the morning to the afternoon and eventually this became consistent as I really get up any day before noon. I’ve even had two years where I didn’t do Christmas with my family or anyone just because my crash hit before the holiday.

The most common reaction is to hit my wall on Christmas Day in the evening… After I get back from wherever I’ve been.. Fortunately, with the improvement of my Fibro over the last almost 5 years, that is shifting.. Crashes are less severe and don’t typically last for week or more on end..

This year, I did well! Before you say that’s it cuz of covid & no one did anything, it’s not true. Christmas this year is not *that* different.

As per the norm, I baked cookies. I give these his gifts to friends, family & my pain physician. It’s not uncommon for me to purchase premade dough however this year I made two different types of cookies from scratch. I have one of those cookies I ended up making up 4 batches. I don’t know how many cookies I made in total but in the end I had enough for two’s cookie swaps with my Cub packs, 3 small baggies, of a half dozen, 8 larger bags of a baker dozen, & 5large bags for almost 2 dozen cookies. I also did up one package of two dozen Brier Rabbit cookies (that’s the recipe I made for of) for a friend of mine who specifically likes that type of cookie.. After all that, I still had some left over.. That’s almost 400 cookies this year.

Cookies From My Cubs

As I usually do, I also did my Christmas shopping in person. I don’t like doing a lot of shopping online unless I know exactly what it is like books. So I do gifts for my sister and her family and my parents every year as well as select friends including my best friend and her family This year I also got a few things for my brother’s family beyond cookies.. Plus stocking stuffers for my Mom and Dad.. So gifts for about 20 people this year.

Because of COVID my deliveries have been different this year.. but I have made them and have had short safe visits with friends. I stopped at my 2nd bff’s on Christmas Eve Day and we had a short safe visit. . Christmas Day was spent with my parents followed by a social distanced gift exchange with my Sister’s family. Afterwards, I stopped by another friend’s later on also for a short safe visit to exchange small gifts. Come Boxing Day, I had a longer, yet still safe visit with my BFF & her family. Finally, I saw another friend that evening and gave him his cookies & gifts..

So Boxing Day evening I hit my wall (My Wile E Coyote IG post shows it well). When I got home about 8:30, I crawled into bed & slept. I ended up overheating in my sleep but you can read more about that here.. Otherwise for the next 24 hours, I slept, only getting up so myself & Lilly could use the facilities and to feed her.

Since then my pain levels have been up and so has my fatigue.. I’ve done very little over this last week. I had a Cub Scout planning meeting on the 27th via Zoom. I’ve had a visit or 2 with Mom & Dad as they only live upstairs.. I fixed a mask, having to replace the elastic & add a third layer. I have watched TV, I have player video games on my phone & I’ve slept.

Do I consider myself bedridden? No.. I’m able to function.. I can get up & take the dog out & Ake myself some food and do liw energy activities. So why am I not doing more? Cuz if I do things will go downhill.. Right now I’m just keeping the course steady so that my body can rest, relax, recuperate and heal..