Being Alone Sucks

I was in a 10 year, give or take, relationship that turned into hell. I left 6 years ago this month..

I moved back to Oshawa. I lost a bunch of weight, I’ve gotten healthier (yes, I still have 6 million medical issues), I’ve reconnected (or thought I had) with old friends, I’ve had two ‘relationships that haven’t really been much more that glorified Friends with Benefits.

So physically, I’m better off but emotionally.. I still feel like shit.

I want to have someone in my life, Someone who is mine. Someone who I can call when I’m having a crappy day & we can talk.. Someone who wants to just hang out, talk & cuddle.. Someone who, honestly, I can say ‘Wanna f**k?’ to who won’t turn me down flat cuz it’s inconvenient for him.

I want something real – not this crap I’m finding over the internet. They are compatible 100% in one aspect but a complete no go in another areas.. Or I find someone who is match in that area & falls significantly short in another area.

I want someone who wants me for me, warts & all. Who matches intellectually, emotionally, physically, sexually on a compatible maturity level.. Is that really too hard to ask for?