Yesterday was the perfect storm. Everything conspired against me.
Poor Sleep. According to my fitbit, for the last several weeks, I’ve been getting usually between 4 & 6 hours of sleep a night, average rating poor-fair. There’s the occasional longer, better sleep in there, but not often..
Forgotten Medication. When I left for the cottage early this morning, I forgot all my meds at home. Admittedly I didn’t need them all today, but there are certain ones that I do have to take at certain times for them to be effective. Unfortunately, those got left at home. I did have limited or weaker alternatives which I suppose is better than nothing.
Emotional Stress. I am currently having problems with my current relationship. I’m not sure if it’s something I can handle and accept or not, so there’s alot going on there..
Poor Diet. Due to the aforementioned stress, I haven’t been eating.. I haven’t been eating well & I haven’t been eating much. Neither is good, both is worse.
Activity. Spent the day in bed.. with my boyfriend, not sleeping. While this is usually a good thing, due to stress, I was unable to truely relax and enjoy it. So I was getting the workout without all the longer term benefits
Physical Stress. After I’d started going down hill, I had a horrible drive home. What would normally be a nice relaxing 1ยฝ hour drive home from the cottage turned into a 3+hour nightmare. Between accidents causing an entire highway to shut down for over 14hrs, excessive detours, multiple accidents on said detours, snow.. The body begins to tense up more & more & more.. and with me being in the car I wasn’t able to like stretch or anything creating more physical stress
For the first time in over 3 years, my pain turned to a solid 8/10.
After 2+ hours, 4 Tylenol3, 4 muscle relaxers, an anti-inflammatory, my CBD oil, prescription edibles, and a backrub with A535.. the edge started to come off, but I also started feeling the effects of over medication too..
How fibro & other issues affect or don’t affect my libido. People who know me but do not have interest in this topic as relates to me, like a sibling or parent, even some friends, you just might want to skip this post.
Lol.. No, this is not me & a partner, but a stock photo. ๐
When I was young, before the fibro became an issue, I was only dealing with the early onset of only Endometriosis & CFS. My sex drive, much to the delight of my boyfriends over the years, was high. I don’t know many women who have that strong a libido. I only know of one female whose libido is close to mine. I’d equate my strong libido levels to that of an 18;year old boy. That tells us something.
I have found that the medical condition itself of fibromyalgia does not impact my libido. It does however impact if, when and how I act on that libido. Whether I’m a passive or active partner, how I can move and what positions I can or can’t get into. And there are some days that are just too painful. The mind is willing, the body not so much.
While the fibro has not impacted the desire, what has impacted it over the years is medications. I’ve had two major medications not only decrease but almost eliminate any sex drive I had.
Fentanyl patches completely killed my libido
Fentanyl: I was, at one point, at 50mcg/hr through a fentanyl patch. And because I had slowly been increased to that.. I didn’t initially notice the libido drop.. It was a slow progression to the complete elimination of any interest.. I was also on it for several years and I guess I attributed the drop in drive as a fibromyalgia issue as many women in the support groups have lost their libido to fibro. I only found out that it had completely suppressed my natural urges when I came off it. It took only a few days for it to return. And return it did! Unfortunately I was single at the time.
Cymbalta significantly impaired my libido
Cymbalta: It seems that there are a lot of antidepressants that can impair one’s sex drive. Fortunately, I’ve never had problems with them until the Cymbalta. It was initially great for my depression, but zero help for the Fibro for me.. But when we tweaked it & bumped it up a level, the mood stabilizer part of the medication was better, but within 48 hours of starting the higher dose, the libido died. We tried it for 6 months to see if that side effect would wear off before switching me to a different medication. My sex drive returned in maybe 36 hours, at most.. But again, I was single again, at the time.
Now, these medications may not impact others the same way and I’m sure there are other medications that will impair sex drive of others. This is my experience and my experience only.
I figure today is the perfect day to discuss this topic, as today July 24 is Self-Care Day,!
What is Self-Care?
Self-care, as defined by the World Health Organization, as what a person does for one’s self to establish and maintain health and to prevent and deal with illness. This includes hygiene, nutrition, lifestyle & activities, environmental factotrs, sociao-ecpnomic factors and self-medication. This includes physical as well as mental & emotional health.
So, basically, taking care of one’s self. & showing yourself some love.
But this is something us with chronic illnesses have a problems doing. We tend not to prioritize ourselves in the grand scheme of things. It is something we need to do to help ourselve help get us better. Not healed, but better.. I guess a more appropriate word would be improved (that is another blog post in & of itself)
So what to do to help ones self? There are a ton of things you could do. Here is a by no means exhaustive list of thngs to help improve your personal health, or self-care. A search on Google will give you additional ideas as well as suggestions for 30 days of self-care, a cheat sheet or a self-care checklist. I’m sure the list below includes information from these sources.
Self-Care Ideas
Take a walk
Meditate
Call a friend
Go out for a coffee/drink with a friend
Read
Warm bath, or hot tub
Yoga
Tale a nap
Dance or just listen to music
Sing
Keep hydrated
Sexual Acrivity
Compliment someone else (You’d be surprised at how well this can make you feel)
Plan kindness activities
Colour.. or Paint.. Do something creative
Knit, sew, crochet, macrame, needlepoint. Make something
Mani/pedi
Get a massage
Hug your kids, furbabies, nieces, nephews, grandkids
Stretch
Watch something funny – Tv show, movie, theatre
Plan a dream vaction
Plan what you would do if you won $25million
Take a trip to the salon to get your hair done
Get dressed up just to get dressed up.. If you look good, you feel good
Journal
Declutter a space on your home
Say or find posotive affeirmations. My mirror says “You’re Beautiful”. Who am I to argue wiht the mirror mirror on the wall?? ๐
Volunteer
Try something new
Ask for help!
Unplug. (This one is difficult for me)
Plan & eat a nutrional, healthy and delicious meal, bonus if its a new recipie
Hang with a friend
Watch funny videos.. I like Jeff Dunhan & Fliffy
Exercise
Eat dessert, but not every day!
Start a new, good habit
Create a bucket list.. A fanaticl one or a realisitic one, your choice
Pop Bubble Wrap!
Watch cute videos online – I love puppy videos, and the kitten ar cute too.. ๐
Go for a drive
Deep slow breathing
Play with or cuddle with your pet
Learn a new skill
Practice positive selft-talk
Walk outside, feel the grass under your feet. (watch for glass if not in your backyard)
Forgive. Not for them, for you. it help you heal
Talk with someone, even a therapist or councillor
Remove negative people or groups from your social media
Family activity day
Make a list of what you are grateful for. Start with being alive, having shelter, and a full belly.. Go from there.
Sit in front of the campfire – Make smores, spider dogs, or mountain pies
Learn something new
Play a sport you enjoy, or watch it professionally
So.. Lots of choices as I said, There are alot of other options out there. Remember this activitiy, or lack threeof, is to make you feel better.
My Go To’s:
Meditate
Slow, deep, easy breathing – helps me sleep
Read
Drive – I love to drive.
Muisc – Listen, sing or dance to.
Volunteer (I’ve been a Scouter with Scouts Canada in some form or another for almost 20 years. – COVID’s made it a challenge)
Mani/Pedi – by myself or at a salon
Hair Salon – Love the head massage when she washes my hair
Sitting by the campfire, preferably with friends or the Cubs with approapriate libations & snacks
Massage therapy
Exercise, when viable.. Walks, jogs, Yoga Aqua-fit, arriba dance, etc.. dependng on pain & energy levels
Hot Tub. I prefer bewtween 99-102.. Can’t do hotter. ๐ฆ
Huggs ๐ From wherever safely possible
Sex, with or without a partner
Go for a drive
Compliment somone – their hair, nails, clothing, shoes, etc..
Forgive
Colour and/or paint
Knots. Not a typical activity, but i like the challenge, plus im a Scouter, go figure.
Socialization with friends & family
Play or Cuddle with Lilly, my dog. ( See: “She Saved Me” post for more info on her.)
Call someone or at least check in for only that purpose, to see how they are.
Think or plan how i\I’d spend lottery winnings
& the obvious – Journalling. My blog, my instagram & facebook pages help me express myself.
What to Avoid:
Excessive or inaprropriate drinking or drug use
Maintaining toxic relationships
Argue excessively
Ovedoing an exercise routine
Stressful situations
Gambling
High-risk behaviours
Voilence to one’s self or others
Other self-destructive behaviours
Self-isolation (except as needed for COVID, but even then you can zoom or call or text) aka Social suicide
The most noticeable and typical symptom of Endometriosis is pain, specifically pelvic pain. The most common time to expect pain is before and during periods, as well as during sex. Some may confuse this with PMS, which presents as abdominal and/or pelvic pain. The discomfort from PMS is typically treated simply with ibuprofen, or up to Xtra Strength Tylenol. Pain from endo tends to be more acute than with PMS and can not be treated as easily with OTC meds. Additionally PMS occurs solely before the menstrual bleed, while endo pain can present before, during, after the cycle and atypically at any time during the cycle. If you have pain like this, check out the additional symptoms and possibly see your doctor. Most Endo Info tomorrow.
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