Pain Is Up!

i had originally scheduled a different post with the same title.. One that should have posted in December, but some of it isn’t relevant anymore, and I’m in a different place, so I am changing it..

Why? Cuz for the first time in years my pain is at a 7/10.. Keep in mind, I picture 20/10 to be the equivalent of having my limbs cut off with a full chainsaw without the benefit of anesthesia or passing out from the pain.

Whats making it worse, is I had an epidural a few weeks back, so my lower back & my pain due to Osteoarthritis is pretty much non-existent. That means, I have fibro pain & *just* fibro pain at a 7/10. Normally when I hit a 7, it’s a combo of fibro & OA. When that happens, if I can dull out the OA pain, I can deal with the fibro.

^{Pain Scale 7/10}

So, its *all* fibro pain & last night I was almost in tears, even with extra (Double) muscle relaxers & narcotics – even a good chunk of alcohol. So there’s not much more that can be done for it, and *nothing* they will do in Emerg to help. They won’t given me any meds stronger than what I am on. Narcotics or a muscle relaxer.

When I do visit the ER, I typically get a toradol shot & a Xanax. Tonight that won’t do anything to help.

The only good thing is that I see my pain doc. Honestly, not sure my shots are even going to help I expect she’s going to recommend a lidocaine infusion, the one treatment I’ve not tried. I think I’m going to say yes this time.

Why so much pain?

Simple, if you read my previous post about CBD, you’ll know my GP thinks it’s my medical marijuana. So I’ve been off the MMJ since February 17th. While not as bad, I’m still nauseated and I am still throwing up. I’ve been on this medication for about 4 years now & it was a huge help getting me off fentanyl..

Due to the extreme bruising, he, my GP, also yanked me off the arthrotec, an anti-inflammatory, a few weeks before that. But I still bruising.. I have been on this medication for decades, since my mid 20s…

So I’ve lost two of my treatments that were helping my fibro, but do not seem to be resolving the problems I took to him.

As a result my pain has been slowly creaping up & I’m experiencing allodynia again. Basically, it is a sensitivity to touch. See next week’s post for more about this & how it’s been impacting me..

My Endo

My Endometriosis diagnosis journey is probably a little different than most. Partly because my symptoms are/were atypical, and partly because my Gyn didn’t believe me.

When my menstrual cycle started in Junior High, I was like every other girl. It started sporadically with varying frequency, duration and heaviness (for lack of a better word). But it stayed that way for months. My friends settled into the appropriate 28 day cycle with 3-5 of moderate bleeding. Then there’s the cramping factor. Some of them got mild to moderate cramps, but most didn’t get much at all while I would doubt over in pain. A friend of mine specifically remembers instances of that, but I only remember crawling up in a ball after I got to the nurse’s office.

By the time I was 15 & had been dealing with it for 2+ years, my GP finally agreed to put me on the birth control pill to help regulate my menstrual cycle and to ease the heaviness and the cramping. And it did, to a point.. My cycle became regular yet was still heavier & longer than my friends. But it was something I could live with.

And I did live with it, occasionally trying other birth control pills over the years. I lived with it for the remainder of high school, another three years, then all through college, another 3½ years.. Even when I had seemingly unrelated issues, I lived with it.

By the time I graduated, moved out & got my first job, I was having ongoing & consistent issues, but not necessarily tied to my cycle anymore.

Because of my earlier issues with my cycle & that it initially eased with BCP, he referred me to a Gynaecologist

So, he sent me to see a Gyn and she does a bunch of blood work, physical exam & even did a pap smear. All came back negative except for my Iron levels were low. Give the amount of menstrual bleeding, it wasn’t surprising..

Because my symptoms were atypical, not directly connected to my menstrual cycle and I was having issues with evacuation, she figured it wasn’t endometriosis and recommended that I see a gastroenterologist.

So off to the gastroenterologist I go.. I got the lovely experience of a colonoscopy resulting in a basic diagnosis of Irritable Bowel Syndrome. From there we began moderating food and supplements, tracking triggers and even after we found out the culprits I was still having severe abdominal pain that was no longer connected to in moderated bowel issues..

Back to the Gynaecologist I go. She was still convinced I did not have Endo. She finally agreed to a lap basically to shut me up. Guess what she found!

Unfortunately, she did not have the long enough tools to reach everything to remove it all.. So, that meant I had a full laparotomy to remove the rest 6 months later.

So, that was my journey to diagnosis

The Problem with CDB

Cannabinoid Hyperemesis Syndrome

Huh? What’s that?

This is a newly (2006) discovered condition the occurs in daily long-term users of marijuana. I’ve been taking CBD & THC products under the supervision of my pain physician for several years now, so that puts me in the regular long term user category.

Basically, it leads to repeated and severe bouts of vomiting. And that started on an infrequent basis for me in January 2021. Very irregular, maybe once a month I’d spend the day hanging out in the bathroom. Nothing stays down, not simple/ dry food like rice or crackers. Even ginger ale, & water would come back up. Sometimes it would get so bad I’d have nothing left to lose and it’s just stomach acid coming up. I have even parked myself in the bathroom waiting for the next bout & then started walking around with a bucket.

^{Hanging out with the porcelain god}

I went up at the cottage last month, got home on February 10th, and that’s when it started. I know it wasn’t food poisoning cuz my cottage mate wasn’t sick either. Plus, it basically hasn’t stopped.

I even ended up in the hospital after three days straight of *nothing” staying down. Regular Gravol doesn’t work on it either, even the ginger stuff.

But now, I’ve been off my MMJ products since February 17th, so a full 4 weeks now & I’m still nauseous almost everyday and I’m losing my stomach contents still on a regular basis.

I finally convinced my doctor that it may not be the CBD and THC products that’s causing this. He gave me a referral to it so just a clinic and I have a scope scheduled in April.

I really hope they can figure this out.

Goooooooooooal!!!

I hit it! It took me just over 10 years to do it, but it’s finally happened!! I hit my goal weight of 170 lbs.. That’s a total loss of 133.8lbs!

^{I stepped on the scale & this is what it told me!}

The next challenge is to maintain it for a month. But if I keep losing, I will go with it. Just being here is phenomenal – I haven’t been this light as an adult because the last time I was this weight, I was 17.

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So, i will be starting up a series in April about the Non-Scale Victories. There are alot of small things that change as you lose weight and some big things. I will discuss all of mine over several weeks.. & not to worry, it’s not going to be every post..

Endometriosis Awareness 2022

March is Endometriosis Awareness Month.

March is Endometriosis Awareness Month

What is Endometriosis? In layman’s terms, it’s when the cells the are supposed to live in the uterus also live outside the uterus.

What does that mean? Well, it means those misplaced cells act like they would it they were in the right place. They have the menstrual cycle, but it’s on the bowel, on the outside of the fallopian tubes, uterus, ovaries, etc, on the rectum, on the bladder, on the kidneys, basically any of the organs in the abdomen. But not only that, these cell can migrate anywhere within the body. This includes more serious, but rate places like the heart, lungs, the spine, and the brain.

What does it feel like? It hurts!! Most women have a regular menstrual cycle. Some women have bad cramps and heavy bleeding..Us with Endo have horrible cramping, debilitating pain that last the duration of the cycle & for up to a week prior & after, and those cycles are irregular & erratic – some times lasting up to 2 weeks, sometimes with only a week, or days, in between. And remember, this happens in those cells that have meandered into the rest of the body, so not all the pain is necessarily in the lower abdomen

What else can happen? In addition to those fun issues already discussed there can be issued with infertility.. With tissues not being where they are supposed to be, the women’s reproductive system is turned into a war zone. And it can really f*”kin hurt to engage in sexual activity. Cuz the tissues are not where they are supposed to be, internal and things very easily get rubbed the wrong way. Add to that the common co-morbidity with Irritable bowel syndrome which in and of itself sucks.

Weight Loss Changes

This is going to be a little series to go over some of the things I have noticed that have changed over the last 10 years of this weight-loss journey.

For those who don’t know my story… Just over 10 years ago, I stepped on the scale at my Doctor’s office in Scarborough. While I’d know my weight had been climbing up, the scale read 303.8 pounds. I was, like, Oh, Hell No!

^{Oh, Hell No}!

My grandmother died at that time as well. While her death didn’t impact my weight, it gives me a time line. Also, I was estranged from most of my family at the time, so almost no one had seen what I looked like. My mom was visibly upset. I thought it was cuz she’d finally got to see me, but I still would not talk to her Turns out, she never expected to see me alive again – either to weight related health issues or by my partner’s hand. Fortunately, neither happened.

So, what did I do? I started to decrease my portion size, eating less. That summer, I started at the local outdoor pool, going as often as I could, to swim for 20-30 minutes. When I could & there was room, it’d swim across the end of the pool, if not, I would simply tread water.

Small steps, but each step was one forward.

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So from here, I’m going to be posting about changes that have occurred, physically, but also mentally & emotionally, over the last ten years. It will be a series, because so many things have changed. Plus, you’ll get a bit of insight into me & how I click.