I’m sure you noticed that the girl in the story has the medical condition Lupus. While obviously not the same medical condition a lot of what she says – No, most – No, all of what she said still applies to anyone with a chronic medical condition.
With fibromyalgia and my other chronic pain conditions I also deal with the daily grind of the limits put on me by my medical conditions. Like Christine, the author, I have a limited amount of energy that I can use each day. Some days I start with more energy, more spoons. Some days I start with less energy, less spoons.
I hope this gives you a new understanding about what it is like to live with chronic pain and chronic illnesses like ours.
My next post is about The Matchbox Theory which I think is actually a little more apt.
As mentioned on Tuesday, I have put a good chunk of weight back on and I’m now starting the process of fighting it back off. Here is my plan:
Exercise: I have reached out to the personal trainers at my gym to inquire to see who would be the best fit for me to set up an exercise regime for me to follow. I’m more likely to do so if it’s set out for me. Part of what helped me lose weight last time was running but I hate running.. At least running for running sake.
Comfort Food: I am no longer bringing in food that I consider to be comfort food that is deadly to the waistline. This means no more cookies or pudding or chocolate. It also means no more ordering pizza or other fast food.
Portion control: I have to return to watching exactly how much I eat. So if I make a pizza from scratch I can’t eat the whole damn thing in one sitting. That is no longer allowed.
Over the last few months, my mental health has not necessarily been the greatest.
Motivation has been down, so getting to do things that aren’t scheduled has been a challenge.
Fatigue has been high, so having the energy to do even the things that are scheduled has been a challenge. I should follow up with my doctor to ensure it’s not just the fibro cuz it’s been more as of late & I am getting my B12 shots done regularly now.
Pain has been escalating. It hasn’t been high enough to warrant a visit to the ER, but it is higher than it was before Christmas. It’s usually been muscular pain in my leggs, sciatica pain in my lower back or just plan old headaches or migraines (a bit of both). Pain doc can’t help with the first or last beyond medications, and I’ve been getting epidurals for the sciatica. Unfortunately my back popped a month or so ago, so the epi hasn’t been as effective (yes, I’m following up with my GP on that when they return my call)
Comfort food has been the go to lately, most of which has not been healthy. Junk food, cookies mostly leftover from Christmas, candy, chips, etc . Not the best choices.
The accumulation of all these factors has resulted in significant weight gain..
Every year for Christmas, I bake cookies to give to friends and family for gifts. To make it easy on myself, I buy some of the dough pre-made. This also allows for a little more variety than if I just made six batches of peanut butter cookies or sugar cookies.
I tried something different this year. Yes, I still bought the pre-mix dough and I also still mixed up some dough. What was different this year is that I only baked the cookies that I needed as I needed them. Previous years I would bake all the cookies and then freezing them all.
While this does take more time, it has been spread out over multiple days. It limits doing repetitive and eventually very painful actions for hours & hours on end. Plus, I’m also not spending one day constantly baking
The other benefit is that for most people, the cookies are fresh – straight from the oven almost in most cases..
Unfortunately, I did not see my brother’s family this year due to a really bad storm the day before our family dinner. He was still digging out with intermittent power. His eldest god to school near me, so I will send the family’s cookies home with her after the holiday break. Until then, they are frozen cuz dough only remains good for a limited period of time.
The only other ones that were baked & frozen were the gluten free ones for my neice’s & SiL’s gluten intolerances. That was done for two reasons. First to ensure that all the gluten-free products were baked on a gluten-free surface and not switching between gluten-free and regular cookies. Second to keep all the gluten-free cookies together. I didn’t want to get them mixed up.
So I have been waiting quite some time for counseling services in my area. Almost 2 weeks ago I called Durham Family services to inquire as to my position on the waitlist. I received a call last Monday from Jason and the intake of Durham Family Services. But apparently there was a bit of a miscommunication. He wasn’t calling to let me know where I stood on the waitlist as per my request, he called to let me know I was at the top of the wait list and to get me set up with counseling.
Yay!
Finally getting a councillor with DFS!
So he was going to set me up with a counselor and I mentioned I would appreciate seeing the counselor I saw a previously. Unfortunately she had a full case load and to add to her caseload they have to get consent specifically from her. Unfortunately she was on vacation all last week so they couldn’t reach her until early this week.
I was called on Wednesday and was advised that the counselor I wanted to see had agreed to add me to her caseload..
Yay!
So, after 13 months of waiting I now have my first appointment set up for late January – only 14 months after first requesting counseling. Oi.
Better late than never
I’m just glad I have an appointment scheduled and it’s with a counselor that I’ve already built a connection with..
Then I have to wait for Catholic Family Services and Carea.. Hopefully they are timed to fit from one to the next to the next! I’d like to get my issues completely dealt with.
Personally, for me, Christmas is probably the busiest time of year. Plus with personal issues that I’ve been having with different relationships, I haven’t been able to focus here very much.. so my apologies for not posting… Again…
Just to give you an idea. Monday was dinner out with a friend I haven’t seen in a coons ahe. Tuesday I have errands all afternoon & a cub planning meeting in the evening.. Wednesday is the Cub year end meeting, a social gathering & baking both before & after those. Thutsday I have to organize the baking, getting some ready for me to post as well as for friends this weekend. In the evening, I’m off to my sister’s for hair & a walk with the dogs. Friday, weather permitting, I’m getting the headlight fixed then I’m heading out for a social event with out-of-town friends I have not seen since Labour Day. Saturday is a coffee date (Whoo hoo!!) Sunday is soccer.. I still need to do groceries: normal groceries, Christmas dinner groceries, cookie baking groceries.. then, more baking as our family Christmas is on the 23rd.. plus wrapping presents for Mom, Dad, Sister & her family & a friend who I exchange with for more than just cookies..
So, yeah . Busy….
And I’m probably missing stuff in the schedule..
Plus I need to fit in exercise, a hot tub or two or 6, plus other personal self care & put up my second tree.. & make some ornaments..
I went on a bit of a downwards slide on the weekend before Halloween. Found out my ex has a promise ring from his new girl. He proceeds to show it to me, tells me what it is, and realizing his stupidity says, “it’s not what you think it means”. Well it may not mean much to him, but I’m sure it does to her.
She also has to have ordered it while he & I were still together. Not impressed.
Spent the next week either busy af, or just feeling everything. No middle ground. Either complete distraction or completely emotional. No stability.
Slowly been trying to work through my emotions about the end of that relationship this last week.. Ups and down, but they are becoming a little less of a roller coaster. Even small improvement is improvement.
So i caught a bug this weekend. Stuffy nose, sore throat, head ache, body aches . Never did take my temperature.. & I noticed something .
The Fibro pain isn’t typically everywhere at once.. it’s usually once place or another, not everywhere.. But you add the body aches & every is now hurting.. yuck.
Fibromyalgia 
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