COVID19 and Me

July 13, 2020

I’ve spoken to many people in the fibro community about this & it seems I’m not the only one deteriourating.. With over 3 month since many of our non-westerm medical treatmens.. So, for most of us it’s only medications, and if we are lucky, pain injections..

We are finding out how much our treatments help us.. Massage Therapy, Physiotherapy, Acupuncture, Osteopathy, Chiropractic Care.. For some it’s the ability to exercise when all pools and gyms have closed including even private facilities. I’m sure there are other possible treatments that I haven’t mentioned – remind me of what they are!!

Personally, I’ve lost physiotherapy & osteopathy, massage therapy, aquafit with other exercise at the gym, and the hot tub – God, I miss the hot tub.

But what I am missing most? Socialization..I’m still in contact with friends, and doing my scouting thing, but it’s not the same. I’ve only seen my best friend once through the glass door.& Then only on Zoom. I haven’t heard from some of my Cub Scouts in months since we went virtual. There are three that despite attempts for contact, that we have not heard hide nor hair of.


Note: the above was originally written in mid-June before we started to re-open in my area. In the last week I have finally had social distance visits with my 2 best friends. I was glad to see them both.

I’ve also seen my RMT, I see my Osteopath next week. And even have my hair appointment with my Mom on Friday.

Now, some pools have opened and the splash pads. Unfortunately, some community & all private gyms like mine are not open.

Puppy Perspective on COVID 19

July 10, 2020

OMG. I saw this & I just had to share. – 4-legged’s perspective of the ‘crisis’, that we call the COVID19 pandemic. It’s a Puppy video.

Non-Scale Victories

July 9, 2020

All these tags are from my clothing.. A size 4X is a 26/28. This is what I wore at my highest weight. I am now in a size 16, a L/XL!! That’s a huge drop.




The last I wore this fanny pack was two years ago at The Phoenix. So, today I put it on and for it to fit, I had to SHORTEN it, but a whopping SEVEN Inches. So, in 2 years, I’ve lost 7 inches of my waist..




I only have one question here – Where in God’s name did my second chin go?!? 😉




So I shaved my Leggs the other day. That, in & of itself, is pretty impressive. But that’s not the victory, although that is one.. But I looked, actually looked at my Leggs, my calves for the first time in a *long* time, like really looked. I I was impressed & happy with what I saw. A visibly smaller leg than what I recall and toning, definition! Whoo hooo!!




A final one. I stopped by my sister’s place some weeks back to pick up the dog. When I walked in the door, wearing summercsummer that actually fit me.. My 19 yo niece looks at me and says.. “Have you lost weight?” She’s never seen me at this weight before, none or the niece’s & nephews have. Not have many of my friends. Obviously my friends from highschool, yeah, but they aren’t high in number.. cuz I’m at the weight I was when I was in college.

My Weight Loss Journey

July 7, 2020
I’ve always been a bit on the bigger side, a little chubby… I was 120lbs starting junior high, finished high school at 180lb, spent my 20s near 220-230lb.. About 15 years ago, I joined weight watchers with my mom and my weight had maxed out at 275lb. I lost almost 60lb on that program. But after that, my lifestyle completely changed and it turns out, not in a good way. So finally about 8-10 years ago, I stepped on the scale weighing a whopping 303lb.

I did not like that number, but wasn’t really in a position to do much about it. Between finances & available services & programs there’s not much I could do. So I started just eating less.. In the summer, we would walk over to the community pool and I would swim – not laps really, but just treading water.. it took a few years, but I lost about 25 lb in 4-5 years with that schedule. Very slow progress, but progress nonetheless.

At that point I moved out of the city, back near my family. My rent included membership to the local YMCA gym. I didn’t figure I’d be using the actual gym much, but I knew I’d use the hot tub. So, I used the hot tub 5-6 days of the week. I then started doing a yoga class at the gym for about a year until the instructor switched times. Then about 2 years ago,, my mom invited me to join her aquafit class..I started doing not much more than bouncing around in the water. But it was fun, so I kept coming back..

At this same time, my eating habits got better. While I still ate junk food, it was less often, and I was eating at least one good healthy & nutritious meal a day. That’s much better than before where fast food was the norm and serving sizes were twice what they shood be.

In the Aquafit, I was slowly working with increased intensity in the class… I started going to a second class later in the week. . The weight started coming off faster.

I tried to add jogging into the mix, but I just couldn’t get into it mentally, not on the ground and my lungs could not handle the cardio What I did do, I would run laps in the water. This worked the muscles but the cardio wasn’t as strong as I was unable to keep my breath while jogging .

I was improving. My health was getting better, pain levels went down (no, not gone, unfortunately), and my clothing started to get looser and looser.

I had items in a size 26 in my closet. I was swimming in those.most of my clothing was a 3X.. and I started to swim in those.

I feel better.. I feel healthier and happier. I actually feel like myself again.

Where do I stand now? I am a size 16, currently weighing in at 207lb, as of my last weigh in. a total loss of 97 lb so far.

Final goal? 180lb.

Beat the Heat

July 6, 2020

Emergency number in Canada & the US is 911.

My Fibro Is Not Her Fibro

July 3, 2020

I’ve written on this before, but that seems to be one of the lost articles in the gap of time. So, I’m taking another stab at it

Do not compare your health with anyone else’s. They are not really comparable beyond the basics.. Yes we may both have fibromyalgia, but my symptoms & treatments are different from everyone else’s . It not like comparing apple & oranges, but more like apples to apple.. a delicious Vs a granny Vs Macintosh. They all have the same basic characteristics, but are still significantly different.

For example,m a friend also has Fibromyalgia. Her diagnosis happened alot quicker because she knew her & I had alot of the same symotoms.

Now, while we both have fibro, we experience it differently and treat it differently. Our symptoms overlap with the obvious: pain, fatigue, IBS, fibro fog, sleep impairments… But from there they differ. I have mental health issues, significant cognitive issues, chemical allergies, speech impairment, & TMJ .. Her issues include balance problems, vertigo, chronic migraines, difficulties maintaining body temperature .. This is by no means an exhaustive list for either of us.

She is able to take some of the pharmaceutical treatments.. They work for her. She also sees a chiropractor on a regular basis. This helps her. She is able to work full time. I’m not saying she does not have pain or fatigue or anything else. I am also not saying she has less pain or less fatigue than I do. I’m saying we experience it differently, we react to it differently, and we treat it differently.

Myself, no, I am unable to work due to my symptoms and have been for many years.i am currently on long-term disability ( there will be a post about morning in the near future) . It has taken a long time to get my symptoms under control with a very different treatment plan than my friend. I’ve tried the pharmaceutical route & most of those medications do not work, or work well for me. In addition to regular visits to my pain doctor, I have alternatingmalternating appointments (well before & after COVID19) with an Osteopath & RMT ATVs local health clinic. I also go to the gym. (Before you jump on me, read my post about my activities at the gym))

So, you can see, two very different people can have very different symptoms, very different treatments, and very different results.

We both have Fibro but we are not the same.

Happy Canada Day!! 🇨🇦♥️🇨🇦

July 1, 2020

Bone-Headed

July 1, 2020

So I was reaching over to the meds on my bedside table. Two things to note: 1. Light is off. 2. I’m reaching behind me.
So after I reached out, I realize I have no clue what I’m looking for.
Of course, since I took all my other meds, I figure it’s my pain meds. So I grab out & take it.
I roll back to my side with a vague feeling that I am missing something. & Realize, nope, not my Tylenol meds.. it’s my OTC Melatonin that is supposed to take.

What about you? Have you forgotten something off the beaten path? Have you seem to have forgotten something to some, yet so important?

About Fibro (Pt II)

June 30, 2020

This is a long read, but if you haven’t ever seen/read it, then it is most def worth the time. Because of it’s length, I’ve made it 2 posts. Fell free to use it for your own use if you so desire.

About Fibromyalgia

Being sick doesn’t mean I’m not still a human being. I have to spend most of my day in considerable pain and exhaustion, and if you visit I probably don’t seem like much fun to be with, but I’m still me stuck inside this body. I still worry about school and work and my family and friends, and most of the time I’d still like to hear you talk about yours too.
The difference between “happy” and “healthy”. When you’ve got the flu you probably feel miserable with it, but I’ve been sick for years. I can’t be miserable all the time, in fact I work hard at not being miserable. So if you’re talking to me and I sound happy, it means I’m happy. That’s all. It doesn’t mean that I’m not in a lot of pain, or extremely tired, or that I’m getting better, or any of those things. Please, don’t say, “Oh, you’re sounding better!”. I am not better, I am sounding happy. If you want to comment on that, you’re welcome.
Being able to stand up for ten minutes, doesn’t necessarily mean that I can stand up for twenty minutes, or an hour. And, just because I managed to stand up for thirty minutes yesterday doesn’t mean that I can do the same today. With a lot of diseases you’re either paralyzed, or you can move. With this one it gets more confusing.
Repeat the above paragraph substituting, “sitting”, “walking”, “thinking”, “being sociable” and so on … it applies to everything. That’s what FMS does to you. – Please understand that FMS is variable. It’s quite possible (for me, it’s common) that one day I am able to walk to the park and back, while the next day I’ll have trouble getting to the kitchen. Please don’t attack me when I’m ill by saying, “But you did it before!”, if you want me to do something then ask if I can. In a similar vein, I may need to cancel an invitation at the last minute, if this happens please do not take it personally.
“Getting out and doing things” does not make me feel better, and can often make me seriously worse. Telling me that I need a treadmill, or that I just need to loose (or gain) weight, get this exercise machine, join this gym, try these classes… may frustrate me to tears, and is not correct… if I was capable of doing these things, don’t you know that I would? I am working with my doctor and physical therapist and am already doing the exercise and diet that I am suppose to do. Another statement that hurts is, “You just need to push yourself more, exercise harder…” Obviously FMS deals directly with muscles, and because our muscles don’t repair themselves the way your muscles do, this does far more damage than good and could result in recovery time in days or weeks or months from a single activity. Also, FMS may cause secondary depression (wouldn’t you get depressed if you were hurting and exhausted for years on end!?) but it is not created by depression.
If I say I have to sit down/lie down/take these pills now, that I do have to do it right now – it can’t be put off or forgotten just because I’m out for the day (or whatever). FMS does not forgive. – If you want to suggest a cure to me, don’t. It’s not because I don’t appreciate the thought, and it’s not because I don’t want to get well. It’s because I have had almost every single one of my friends suggest one at one point or another. At first I tried them all, but then I realized that I was using up so much energy trying things that I was making myself sicker, not better. If there was something that cured, or even helped, all people with FMS then we’d know about it. This is not a drug-company conspiracy, there is worldwide networking (both on and off the Internet) between people with FMS, if something worked we would KNOW.
If after reading that, you still want to suggest a cure, then do it, but don’t expect me to rush out and try it. I’ll take what you said and maybe discuss it with my doctor.

In many ways I depend on you – people who are not sick – I need you to visit me when I am too sick to go out… Sometimes I need you help me with the shopping, cooking or cleaning. I may need you to take me to the the doctor, or to the physical therapist. I need you on a different level too . You’re my link to the outside world… if you don’t come to visit me then I might not get to see you. … and, as much as it’s possible, I need you to understand me.

About Fibro (Pt I)

June 29, 2020

This is a long read, but if you haven’t ever seen/read it, then it is most def worth the time. Because of it’s length, I’ve made it 2 posts. Fell free to use it for your own use if you so desire.

About Fibromyalgia

My Need for Massage Therapy– If I get a massage every week, don’t envy me. My massage is not your massage. Consider how a massage would feel if that Charley horse you had in your leg last week was all over your body. Massaging it out was very painful, but it had to be done. My body is filled with painful knots. If I can stand the pain, regular massage can help, at least temporarily.

My Good Days – If you see me smiling and functioning normally, don’t assume I am well. I suffer from a chronic pain and fatigue illness with no cure. I can have my good days or weeks or even months. In fact, the good days are what keep me going.

My Uniqueness – Even those who suffer from FMS are not alike. That means I may not have all of the problems mentioned above. I do have pain above and below the waist and on both sides of my body which has lasted for a very long time. I may have migraines or hip pain or shoulder pain or knee pain, but I do not have exactly the same pain as anyone else. (Keep an eye out for the reposting of the topic “My Fibro is Not Her Fibro”)

My Weight – I may be fat or I may be skinny. Either way, it is not by choice. My body is not your body. My body’s metabolism is broken, and nobody can tell me how to fix it. Often the medication I must take causes weight gain, but many of us with fibro suffer from severe IBS and lose weight.

My Stress – My body does not handle stress well. If I have to give up my job, work part time, or handle my responsibilities from home, I’m not lazy. Everyday stresses make my symptoms worse and can incapacitate me completely.

My Depression – Yes, there are days when I would rather stay in bed or in the house or die. I have lost count of how many of Dr. Kevorkian’s patients suffered from FMS as well as other related illnesses. Severe, unrelenting pain can cause depression, but it is a result of the Fibro.. not a cause of it.. Your sincere concern and understanding can pull me back from the brink. Your snide remarks can tip me over the edge.

My Sensitivities – I just can’t stand it! “It” could be any number of things: bright sunlight, loud or high-pitched noises, textures, odors, food, etc.. FMS has been described as the “aggravating everything disorder.” So don’t make me open the drapes or listen to your child scream. I really can’t stand it.

My Intolerance – I can’t stand heat, either. Or humidity. If I am a man, I may sweat…profusely. If I am a lady, I perspire. Both are equally embarrassing, so please don’t feel compelled to point this shortcoming out to me. I know. And don’t be surprised if I shake uncontrollably when it’s cold. I don’t tolerate cold, either. My internal thermostat is broken, and nobody knows how to fix it.

My Clumsiness – If I step on your toes or run into you five times in a crowd, I am not purposely targeting you. I do not have the muscle control for that. If you are behind me on the stairs, please be patient. These days, I take life and stairwells one step at a time.

My Forgetfulness – Those of us who suffer from it call it fibrofog. I may not remember your name, but I do remember you. I may not remember what I promised to do for you, even though you told me just seconds ago. My problem has nothing to do with my age (Young people can get fibro) but may be related to sleep deprivation. I do not have a selective memory. On some days, I just don’t have any short-term memory at all.

My Fatigue – I am not merely tired. I am often in a severe state of exhaustion. I may want to participate in physical activities, but I can’t. Please do not take this personally. If you saw me shopping in the mall yesterday, but I can’t help you with yard work today, it isn’t because I don’t want to. I am, most likely, paying the price for stressing my muscles beyond their capability.

My Pain – My pain is not your pain. It is not caused by inflammation. Taking your arthritis medication will not help me. I cannot work my pain out or shake it off. It is not even a pain that stays put. Today it is in my shoulder, but tomorrow it may be in my foot or gone. My pain is believed to be caused by improper signals sent to the brain, possibly due to sleep disorders. It is not well understood, but it is VERY real.