I know.. it’s got nothing to do with fibro, or health, but it’s my blog so I can pick the occasional off topic.
So.. Tips for Guys in their online dating profiles… I think unless you are in a hardcore fetish site or a site exclusively for hookups only, I think these suggestions might help you get a better response from the ladies.. or laddie’s, if you swing that way…
Have a Good Profile picture:
Picture of you, your face, not your dog, your bike, your fish, your boat or your genitalia.
Smile!!! Unless you a totally serious person.. Have at least one photo of you with an honest smile on your face.
Make sure you are the focal point of the picture. The point is to see you, not the statue or whatnot you are standing beside. & Loose the mask so we can see your face & also be cognizant of the light and shadows they cast
Picture of only you, no other people. You can put picture of you with your kid(s), your family, your friends elsewhere in your profile, just not the main one
No pictures with blanked out faces. Just crop the other person out, or use a different picture
Make sure it’s in focus and check the lighting to make sure your face can be seen.
Keep the background simple, unless it is highly relevant to you. & No taking your pictures in the damn car – be original! Try to blur out any busy backgrounds if you can
Don’t add any filters to your image..Don’t need to bling it up
Keep your images current, especially if your look changes..
Do not use memes as your first few images,
Don’t use the picture from work, be it an ID badge, business card or a professional marketing materials. Most of these are too posed & too stiff to represent you well in this medium.. & for ID badges, nthose are not typically a complimentary picture
Brush your hair, put on something nice if you are going to take a selfie & taking from straight on or better slightly above, but not beliw
Dont use an Avatar for your user image, and doing be someone that’s not you, esp a celeb.. If you are not Shemar Moore’s twin, don’t use his picture.
Include multiple pictures.. The second & third & fourth can include your kids or your dog.. but skip the one where your sister is giving you a high – first question is always – Who is she? His wife?.
Do not use the same picture more than once
Only use a “dick pic” if you are on a hookup site & that’s what you are looking for.
Add actual profile content.. it does not have to be long only 3-4 sentences to start… And you can add more later.
Write *Something* Don’t just leave it blank
Describe what you a looking for be it a hookup, a fwb, a dating partner or something long-term & permanent..
Describe what you’re looking for in someone. Be upfront. If you don’t like Asian Women, say so. If you don’t like Smokers, say so. If you want someone 420 friendly then say so.
Tell us about you – character traits & descriptive words that might help: Funny, sarcastic, confident, laid-back, determined, passionate, ambitious, kind, outgoing, shy, outdoorsy, homebody, animal lover, thrifty, open-minded, politically savvy, honest, honourable, adaptable, Raptors fan, imaginative, creative, spontaneous, happy, friendly, movie liver, compassionate, loyal, humble, meticulous, picky, assertive, sports enthusiast, reliable, sociable, enthusiastic, meticulous, generous, curious, clean, tidy, healthy, charming, brilliant, courageous, artistic, dramatic, playful, creative, principled, honourable, organized, scatterbrained, disciplined, affectionate, faithful, private, extreme, unique, sincere, reserved & shy vs affable & gregarious, talkative or quiet, adventurous, hardworking, Liberal vs Conservative vs Socialist, strong-willed, respectful, blunt, democratic, self-sufficient, wise, smart, sexy, vain, modern VA old fashioned, physical, hedonistic, money-driven, delicate, opinionated, predatory, zany, sassy …That’s a good list to help you out
Answer some of the questions different sites ask.. “What can you cook? What TV shows do you watch?
Be clear & concise. Be aware of spelling, punctuation & grammar..
The more you complete of your profile, generally also means the more accurate your matches are..
Do not have multiple profiles.. I’ve come across the same guy in 3 different profiles.. I blocked all.three cuz he’s not a twin or a ltriple.
Any other suggestions? For guys, or ideas for gals aswell – I could always new tips!
When my Dad’s Mom died in February of 2012, I weighed 303lbs & change at my Pain doctor’s office in Scarborough. I didn’t like that. So I made a few changes, started to eat less and getting low levels or simple but regular exercise Very slowly, I started to loose weight by the time I moved back to Oshawa in May 2016, I’d lost 20-30 pounds.
Since then, I’ve made alot more changes and have lost more.. but I have an announcement to make that I am super proud of.
On Tuesday, I stepped on the scale at my pain doctor’s office in Oshawa (the Scarborough & Oshawa scales differ by 0.1 lb) I was stunned by the number. 203.0 lbs
That’s 100lbs!!! I’ve lost a third of my size!! Yay me!
Am I done? No.. I do plan on loosing another 23lb.. my final expected goal is 180lb, where I was at the end of high school.. If I loose more than that, but not too much more – I still wanna keep my curves & don’t want to loose my boobs!
Edit: On September 30, I also hit my second goal of getting back into Onederland – where the first digit of my weight is a 1, so under 200lb. Less than 20lb to go.
Recently the definition of “Pain” was updated for the First Time Since 1979!!
After 40 years, a multi-national, multi-disciplinary IASP Task Force developed a revised definition of pain that was recently published in the journal, PAIN, along with the associated commentary by President Lars Arendt-Nielsen and Immediate Past President, Judith Turner. The revised definition included input from all potential stakeholders, including persons in pain and their caregivers.
The IASP Task Force crafted the revised definition, along with the six notes, to better convey the nuances and the complexity of pain in hope that it leads to improved assessment and management of those with pain.
• The 2020 revised definition of pain is: “An unpleasant sensory and emotional experience associated with, or resembling that associated with, actual or potential tissue damage,” and is expanded upon by the addition of six key notes and the etymology of the word pain for further valuable context:
• Pain is always a personal experience that is influenced to varying degrees by biological, psychological, and social factors.
• Pain and nociception are different phenomena. Pain cannot be inferred solely from activity in sensory neurons.
• Through their life experiences, individuals learn the concept of pain.
• A person’s report of an experience as pain should be respected.
• Although pain usually serves an adaptive role, it may have adverse effects on function and social and psychological well-being
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French peine (pain, suffering), from Latin poena (penalty, punishment), in turn from Greek poine (payment, penalty, recompense)
A central change in the new definition, compared to the 1979 version, is replacing terminology that relied upon a person’s ability to describe the experience to qualify as pain. The old definition read: “An unpleasant sensory and emotional experience associated with actual or potential tissue damage or described in terms of such damage.” This wording was interpreted as excluding infants, elderly people, and others – even animals — who could not verbally articulate their pain, said Dr. Jeffrey Mogil, Director of the Alan Edwards Center for Research on Pain, McGill University and member of the Task Force
Source: APCA current “Comprehensive Toolkit for Heal Professionals 2020”
I have been wearing a mask in stores (and limiting my trips) since March when this whole thing went down.
I’m wearing one of the four masks I currently have.. I’ve ordered a few more of various different styles..
I’m not sure how being considerate to others for the common good is now being mocked by some who are calling it “living in fear”, but it needs to stop…. When I wear a mask over my nose and mouth in public and in the stores/ Supermarkets/ Pharmacies/ Offices – I want you to know the following: 🔵 I’m educated enough to know that I could be asymptomatic and still give you the virus. 🔵 No, I don’t “live in fear” of the virus; I just want to be part of the solution, not the problem. 🔵 I don’t feel like the “government controls me”. I feel like I’m an adult contributing to the security in our society and I want to teach others the same. 🔵 If we could all live with the consideration of others in mind, the whole world would be a much better place. 🔵 Wearing a mask doesn’t make me weak, scared, stupid or even “controlled”. It makes me caring and responsible. 🔵 When you think about your appearance, discomfort, or other people’s opinion of you, imagine a loved one – a child, father, mother, grandparent, aunt, uncle or even a stranger – placed on a ventilator, alone without you or any family member allowed at their bedside…..Ask yourself if you could have helped them a little by wearing a mask.
I copied and posted.. I take no credit in writing this.. The original author is unknown… it’s from another friend’s Facebook who also copied & shared fron someone who copied & shared..etc..
In 2001 The American Chronic Pain Association led a coalition of groups to create the first Pain Awareness Month. These iincluded the NAACP, the Endometriosis Association, the American Cancer Society, various nursing organizations and several FM, CFS/ME organizations They assembled under the umbrella of the Partners for Understanding Pain.
This coalition was committed to raising awareness through mass media, public forums, and other sources so that chronic pain may be more readily recognized, better understood without the traditional stigma attached, and more fittingly treated and managed. The partnership, spearheaded by the ACPA, strived to create greater understanding among health care professionals, individuals and families who are struggling with pain management, the business community, legislators, and the general public that pain is a serious public health issue.
Did you know?
• Nearly 100 million Americans experience chronic pain —more than those who have diabetes, heart disease and cancer combined.
• Pain is a warning sign that indicates a problem that needs attention.
• Pain starts in receptor nerve cells located beneath the skin and in organs throughout the body.
• Living with pain can be debilitating and adversely affect everyday life.
Examples of pain include: Arthritis, Degenerative Disc Disease, Headaches & Migraines , Fibromyalgia, Multiple Sclerosis, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS), Sickle Cell Disease, Cancer, Phantom Limb Pain and many more.
Today in the 19th anniversary of the September 11th (9/12) Attacks on the World Trade Center towers, the Pentagon, with another headed, presumably to the White House..
The Statue of Liberty with the pre-9/11 World Trade Center with both towers tall & proud
The attacks resulted in close to 3,000 fatalities, over 25, 000 injuries and substantial long-term health consequences.
Please, take a moment of silence to remember those who have been lost to us that day by hate & fear..
The view from the south pool on the 9/11 Memorial plaza in Manhattan, NY… Photo by Jin S Lee..
it’s interesting how terminology reflects how people perceive what you say. Using one word over another well meaning the same 2 Chainz how it is interpreted.
for example, if I was to tell somebody that I was feeling better. People who are not chronically ill take this to mean “all better” cut, as in completely healed, no longer sick. For then, being better from something like a cold means they are no longer sick. This is not the case for us with Chronic health conditions. “Better” could mean my pain levels are lower than yesterday or my fatigue has abated somewhat rh my fibro fog has cleared for the day.
because of this, I like to use the word improved. Well this means the exact same thing, people do not assume that I’ve been healed. They typically realize that there is an improvement to a point. Which is essentially what I’m trying to say. While I am still sick, and will remain so for the rest of my life, that day I feel improved, I am not feeling as bad as I was before for whatever reason
Try using the word Improved the next time you intend to use the word better for your health. See what different reaction you get.
I recently saw this Statistic online.. Given my history I’m not surprised, but is it true?
What my research shows is that a Dutch study published in October 2019. found that women with Fibromyalgia have a 10-fold increase in risk for suicide.
“Our data show that both suicidal ideation and the risk of suicide were higher in both patient groups compared with the controls, but they were highest in patients with fibromyalgia. Depression was the factor most strongly associated with both suicidal ideation and the risk of suicide. Examining the characteristics of both patient groups, it was apparent that pain intensity and physical health were similar but that the severity of depression and mental health status were significantly worse among patients with fibromyalgia. Sleep quality was poor in both groups but was worse among patients with fibromyalgia.”
Anothervarticle expands in that, claiming mutiple studies support this, but I have not found additional studies. This same articles states that Fibromites are about three times more likely than other chronic pain patients. Given he lack of confirmation of the first comment, I’m not sure how reliable the second claim is.
Multiple studies conducted as a result of the Dutch research has encountered a slightly different conclusion. These additional studies have determine that while yes, Women with Fibromyalgia do have an increase risk of suicide. However, this statistic is only accurate within a sub-set of this. They determined that women with Fibromyalgia who *also* have depression are ar a 10 tunes increase in the risk of suicide.
The most recent independent study shows a mild to moderate risk of a suicide in fibromyalgia patients. This study also, unlike previous, takes into account other factors including age, gender, occupation status, monthly income, NSAID use, and comorbidities. .
My Conclusion: People with Fibro have no more risk of suicide than other chronic pain patients. But people with Fibro AND depression/anxiety are at significant risk of suicidal ideologies.
However, it is important to remember that fibromyalgia and depression are strongly related. Patients with fibromyalgia frequently suffer from a comorbid major depressive disorder,
When treating women with fibromyalgia, doctors should be on the lookout for depression and warning signs of suicide, according to a new study.
Fibromyalgia 
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